The One Excuse I'm Giving Up for Good
I sat in my favorite yoga class completely amazed. When the instructor said this was a good time to go into a headstand if that was part of your practice, I expected everyone to join me in a nice child’s pose. Nope. Instead everywhere I looked I saw headstands. Sure the fit 20 something was doing one, but so were the 40 and 50 somethings. That guy who was huffing and puffing during the entire class was right up there too.
Immediately my brain started to comfort me. Well I can’t do a headstand because my core is weak from having two kids. I can’t possibly practice headstands everyday - I’m raising little kids! Must be nice to just sit around and do yoga all day.
And that’s when it hit me. Whenever I am confronted with a new skill or unfulfilled dream, I fall back on my go-to excuse - I’m a mom! And that’s all it is, an excuse.
There is no rule that moms can’t do headstands or travel by themselves or build booming businesses.
That is a story that I’ve adopted, but it’s really not fair to anyone. It’s not fair to me, because it keeps me small. It’s not fair to my husband, because who wants to live with a martyr? It’s definitely not fair to my innocent, joyful 4 and 1 year-olds. I actually can’t believe I’ve placed such a burden on them without realizing it. Mommy can’t live her dream life, because you’re here.
The truth is, they’re the reason I’m living this dream. I NEVER would have started a business and left a stable career had it not been for them. C and J gave me the courage to step out of my comfort zone and really go for it. My desire to be with them was stronger than my fear of the unknown.
And that’s what I have to remember. It’s not about me. It’s not even about them. If there’s a goal I haven’t accomplished, it’s because fear has kept me from really trying. Period. Case closed.
So what can we do about it?
The first step is to just get honest with yourself. What does your dream life look like? Are you traveling? Running marathons? Launching businesses? Then write down all the reasons that you haven’t been able to accomplish that dream.
Once you have your list, read through each reason and just say to yourself, “I forgive myself for using this excuse. I am ready to go bigger.”
That’s really all it takes. By acknowledging that you’ve been keeping yourself small, you’re giving yourself permission to ditch those excuses.
Realizing that those reasons are just excuses is liberating. Maybe there’s a way around them. Or maybe you just plain don’t really want to go after that goal. That’s okay! Just make the decision from a place of empowerment, rather than as a victim.
Feeling brave? Tell us in the comments below what your go-to excuse is. We’ve all got one. Then tell us one small action you’re going to take to move past it.