The #1 Fear of Work-at-Home Moms
Fear is like that mean girl in high school. No matter what you do, it insists on cutting you down. You come to school rocking your new killer Doc Martens only to find out they’re out, and Steve Madden is in. Every time you’re feeling awesome about yourself, it swoops in to remind you that you’re not that great after all. Fear is sneaky too. It convinces us that it’s protecting us. It disguises itself as being “realistic” or “just not getting your hopes up.”
The truth is that fear will always be with us, especially if we’re building something new. There is of course healthy fear that keeps us from touching a hot stove or diving into an ocean full of rocks. But how often do you find yourself on a cliff about to dive into sharp boulders? More likely you’re feeling fear in your everyday life when your life is not in danger. This type of everyday fear is dangerous, because it keeps us stuck.
Mompreneurs and work-at-home moms are no strangers to this fear. As an entrepreneur, I constantly feel this fear sitting just below the surface. When my business is growing, I worry that I’m not spending enough time with my kids. And after a fun day with family, I feel lazy and undisciplined for not writing a blog post or sending out an invoice. I worry that I’m not a good enough wife, mother, friend, business owner; the list goes on.
And that brings me to our #1 fear as work-at-home moms. It is of course everyone’s #1 fear… the fear of not being enough.
Not brave enough to leave our corporate jobs. Not smart enough to figure out a new business. Not experienced enough to charge for our services, like writing or coaching. Not wealthy enough to be able to quit daycare and stay home. Just not enough.
This fear can take us down and kill our dreams before we’ve even tried. If you have been dreaming of working from home, you’ve run into this. You know the fear will always be there, so instead of denying it or ignoring it (it will only scream louder), try working with it. Here are 3 ways to move past the fear that’s been holding you back from your dream career and life.
Gratitude is your only attitude
We’ve talked about this before, but our brains literally cannot focus on 2 things at once. So when we consciously choose a positive thought, it’s impossible to feel scared. The best way to do this is gratitude. When you focus on all the awesome things in your life, not only will you feel better in the moment, but you’ll start acting differently without even realizing it.
After C was born, I wanted nothing more than to be home with her. Unfortunately we were counting on my fulltime income, and I had no idea how to get out. I was always thinking about how hard life was, the daycare drop-off, feeling exhausted. Once I decided to try to think of 10 things I was grateful for everyday, everything changed.
I started focusing on how wonderful and supportive my coworkers were. When I thought about how much I was going to miss them when I left that job, I started thinking of ways to help them. I wrote a guide to my job for the next person. Even though I saw no end in sight, I started preparing for my departure. I immediately felt more positive, and I was able to help the person who would eventually take my job. Win-win.
Tap into help
There is help all around us, but we’re often so in our heads that we don’t even see it. When you’re feeling anxious, there is nothing worse than staying in your head. Tell someone, and you’ll instantly feel better.
If you’re a spiritual person like me, you know that we are always surrounded by an all-powerful, loving energy. We came from pure love, and we can return to that state any time we choose. I ask for help and guidance from God constantly, and I always receive a sign.
Focus on service
Whenever I’m feeling fear around what I’m creating, I am always focused completely on myself. Who am I to start a blog? Who am I to call myself an expert? Will people judge me? When I catch myself doing this, I immediately turn it around and start thinking about the people I’m serving.
When I focus on that stressed out mama who wants to be home with her kids, it’s really easy to think of blog topics and resources that could help her. The more I focus on being of service, the less time I have to think about how I will look in the process.
What about you?
So if you’re up for it, spend a little quiet time today asking yourself what you’re afraid of when it comes to your career. I’m betting that each and every fear comes down to not feeling good enough.
The good news is that you are absolutely perfect and have unique gifts to share. Think about something you’ve been putting off because of fear. For me, it was finally getting on Facebook Live last week. Commit to doing at least one thing that scares you to move your career or biz forward in the next week.
And if you’re feeling sassy, tell us what you’re planning to do in the comments below. I CANNOT wait to hear what you’re up to and be inspired!